Heart Break.

"and I have the Sense to recognize that I don't know how to let you go."


I took the ring off, and with out it I feel naked. Looking at the place where it once was, remembering what was and what I thought would have been, looking back on the day she slipped it on to my finger. Now the ring sits on my in my jewlery box with all the other unimportant jewlery I never wear. I had to put it away so that I cannot see it, because every time I look at it I am reminded of all that will never be. I was looking at all the pictures, reading through all of our old messages and comments and for the life of me I cannot understand how she can just stop loving me in such a short amount of time. How can some one fall so quickly out of love? What did I do that was so wrong? What is so wrong with me that in a matter of two weeks everything that was said and done now means nothing? It is easier on her because she no longer loves me. But I am still in love with the one person I can no longer have. I have never felt so emotionally Drained and never before has my heart ached so bad. I would much rather have believed that this was all my fault, rather than know that she just does not love me any longer because atleast then there is hope, at least then there is a chance I can fix it. But how do I fix what is no longer there? I cant, and it is all I wish to do. I keep hearing that 'there are other fish in sea' and that I will find some one else but I do not want to love any one else, only her. How did I not know she no longer loved me? am I really Just that blind? I thought we were happy, I thought this was fate. I was stupid to think such a thing. I try to be positive, thinking well maybe it was fate that brought us together, whether it is meant as lovers or just as friends, whether we end up together again, or 10 years from now we are getting our two families together for dinner. But how can I believe what I am telling my self when it feels like my heart and soul have been taken from me, smashed on the ground around where I lay, looking some ridiculous chalk out-line. I will get over this one day I am sure, but for now I just want to wallow in my heart ache.

" Deep within I'm shaken by the violence Of existing for only you."